Have you done it in the past?
I haven’t done this… yet. I have an interest, but it is something I have not tried and would be nervous going alone. I don’t have any other friends that are into BDSM (that I know of). It is always such a taboo discussion item. Some are open but not sure they would want to join me. I always considered it a private thing and until recently didn’t think I would be comfortable. Although, when I started dated a woman who was a new community that I had to acclimate to and did ok. But it is more acceptable to be gay then to be sexually “out of the norm”. Although most feel that being gay is out of the norm so there is that.
What was your experience? Are you nervous or shy?
I am nervous. I would love to have others to talk to and discuss things with, or just be able to be open about things. Not to divulge details about my private life, but to have friends that understand why I do what I do and why it is important to me and why I take the role I do. I am not horrible in social situations if I have at least one person to anchor to. I don’t have to be glued to that person but having someone I know close is helpful. Although at times I want to be impulsive. I have looked for a few groups and found some (more than I expected actually) and it is something I am planning on doing. I am in the process of researching it now and trying to find something that feels comfortable on paper. I know I’ll have to go to a few different ones to find the right fit.
Explore your feelings and consider whether the local community is a viable option for you?
I think it is an option and something I want to do. It is just getting started. Not having anyone to talk to is hard. I know my situation is complicated and I have to be careful to not disclose anything Sir would not like. But finding others to hang with, even on a friend level, would be nice. Sir even suggested it when I was explaining how I feel about not having anyone to talk to. It was always something I wanted to do with him, but since that seems a while away, I should get motivated to do it myself. I see the community on-line (twitter and Loving BDSM) and would love that kind of connection. To be a part of something, a group, that gets it.
New goal – find a community event to attend in September. Maybe August!
Thoughts provoked by Loving BDSM