How Many Chapters

How many chapters is a good amount for a book?  Twenty?  Thirty?   I guess it’s based on the information or story you are trying to tell .  Then how many chapters in a lifetime is a good amount?

I break my life down in chapters. When something ends I always say it is the end of a chapter to prepare myself for the next. My life has many chapters so far and I am about to start another one. Some of the chapters blend smoothly into the next. Some have abrupt ends and startling beginnings.

No matter the reason the changes and shifts to the next chapter fill me with anxiety and worry. This chapter is no different.   I wish I could be excited.  I wish I could look forward positively and with hope and enthusiasm.  I fear the newness as an unsure change.

So I “cowgirl up” and all the plans I had will wait.   All the hopes I had will fade.  I will keep my mask on and move through the day as the positive person the world thinks I am.  And the fear will stay behind the mask. Until I am alone.

On to the next chapter!

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